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G-tube, Forever? Please No.

Corban is still very happy to be home, and we are THRILLED to have him home! He has been sleeping better this past week, which makes a huge difference in our overall sanity.

He's still not doing very well taking a bottle, though. After being on the ventilator for 4 months and a feeding tube for close to 5, he's not used to this whole "feeding" thing. His sucking reflex is weak, his palate is high (from ventilator tubing), he often chokes on the milk, gets scared and cries, then doesn't want to have anything to do with it. I'm always nervous when that happens, knowing that aspirating is a real possibility for him.

His overall muscle weakness (from the AMC) is a factor too. It means that doing something as simple as taking a bottle, requires a lot of energy. And now that he is spending more time and energy working on oral feeds, it means his weight gain has slowed down. He's expending more energy on the "work of eating."

What a concept, right? The "work of eating." Don't I wish I could classify "eating" as "work!" Well, for him, it is. So, it's a tricky balance. We want him to eat on his own, but we also want him to GROW. Feed him through the G-tube, and he grows. But then he doesn't learn how to eat. Feed him through the bottle, and he doesn't grow. What can I do? I can't win.

And not to spend all my time complaining. He's doing great! He really is. He's come such a long way from where he was a couple months ago. Even just a few weeks ago! He's a miracle baby. And I'm thankful for the G-tube.

But, I would LOVE for him to go even further in this area. It would make life a lot easier on all of us. The way things are going now, I spend a good 6-8 hours a day on his feeds (between pumping, bottle feeding, g-tube feeding, cleaning his bottles, bags and the tubing for the g-tube pump). I can't do much else right now, but feed him.
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Photo Shoot

Corban had his very first photo shoot today. Not like the ones Mommy did in the NICU. THESE actually look good. Our dear friend, Kristi, got some amazing shots and was sweet to give us the photo shoot as a gift. So, you can gawk. It's ok. Just click on the picture to enlarge it if you want to gawk up close.  

 
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Gaining Weight... FINALLY!

Corban's still doing really well and enjoying being home. We've been enjoying him too. Of course. But to make sure we aren't the only ones who think he's doing well, we've been having a home health nurse come out twice a week to check on him and make sure he's gaining enough weight. He was 5lb. 1oz. at birth and left the NICU 5 months later at 7lb. 7oz., so weight gain hasn't exactly been his strong suit. Well, today, I am proud to announce that he has consistently gained an ounce a day over the last 2 weeks. He is now a whopping 8lb. 13oz.! Woo-hoo! We'll start calling him "fat squishy" in no time at all!
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Just Soaking It In

I had a sweet, sweet time with my boys tonight. Decided to forget about the stacks of dishes and piles of laundry, and instead, just enjoy having my family together at last. First, I soaked in my time with Corban, rocking him in the glider to my heart's content, singing him some of his favorite songs. Then I pulled out a couple books, held the boys in my lap, and read to them for as long as we wanted to. I finally convinced myself that "it is bedtime" after all and they'll need to go to sleep at some point. So, I set Corban down and went to put J in bed. I gave him a hug and a kiss, put him in bed and said, "I love you, J." As I turned my back and started to walk out, my man of very few words said for the first time, "Me. Too."

Wow. Even the largest of vocabularies cannot express the joy of that moment. I'd say it was well worth a sink full of dirty dishes. :)